“I want to relay a story to you that touched me deeply. I hope Emily’s story provides some inspiration for your next celebration.”

Emily spent many magical hours fantasising about hosting her daughter’s third birthday party. There would be enormous pink paper flowers and fairy lights threaded through her backyard trees; rose petals lacing the soft grass leading to a fairy-grove where the girls would ooh and aah at the glitter balls and candy-pink balloons; floaty butterfly wings for each of the guests to attach to their backs; and sugary treats to tempt her guests. The sun would shine and the only sound you would hear would be the sweet giggles of little girls…

But then her daughter Becca was invited to the birthday party of one of her preschool friends…

Olivia was the first child in the preschool to turn three and to celebrate the occasion twenty sub-three year olds were invited to a fun-for-all at a play-gym in the city. The day of Olivia’s party arrived and Emily dressed Becca in her loveliest party dress, with ribbons in her hair and white satin boots. She held in her little hands a silver foil wrapped Barbie doll topped with a silk butterfly. It was the first party she had attended for preschool. Emily wanted her to make a great impression.

Emily and Becca were equally perplexed when they arrived at Olivia’s party. Instead of the marshmallow pink of their fantasies for Becca’s party, the play-gym was decked out in modern, minimalist décor. On the sparsely decorated tables sat bananas, bowls of fruit salad and vegetable crudités with hummus dip. The kids looked at the veges and simply decided to dip their fingers into the pots of hummus… and spread it all over the tables and themselves.

The theme for the day? Advancing our children. The entertainment included book-readings, a recital from a classical pianist, and collage-making with ABC-tiles. The food was healthy but mean for three-year-olds!

Two-hours later, the carob-cake cut and served to the guests with natural yoghurt, Becca was well and truly ready to go home. When Emily thanked Olivia’s mum, Sarah, she asked her where she got her inspiration for the event. Sarah told Emily that she took inspiration from a recent birthday party held by Madonna for her daughter, Lourdes. Apparently, they had served only vegan dishes and the kids had played only intellectually-stimulating games. Like Madonna, she wanted to motivate her daughter to be the very best she could be. She wouldn’t abide Olivia eating sugar or white flour, or spending time on non-stimulating activities.

Ouch. Suddenly, a pang of guilt struck Emily. Was she letting Becca down with her fantasies of butterflies and pink fairy-floss?

It was that same afternoon that I took the call from a distraught Emily. “Kathryn, I need help! Becca’s birthday is only a month away and I need to change the theme, the catering, the decorations, the entertainment… help me!” she cried.

Emily and I met and talked about her dilemma. And yes, whilst the wholesome approach to children’s parties has become popular recently led in part by celebrities such as Madonna, Gwyneth Paltrow and Stella McCartney, I still believe the most wonderful gift you can give a child is a fantasy party in which they live out their wildest dreams with their friends and family. You want the party you’re organising for your little one to be an occasion he or she remembers and talks about for many years to come. In a positive way!

To me, the sheer joy of a toddler’s face when presented with their themed birthday cake or when they rip open their gift, is what hosting a party is all about.

I told Emily that if Becca and she wanted fairies with the gooiest of pink themes, we should absolutely make it happen. And this isn’t hampering Becca’s development. As a matter of fact, encouraging your children to indulge in their imaginations is incredibly enriching for your whole family.

So, Becca celebrated her birthday in fairy style. We purposefully made it a kitsch pink event. The invitations were candy pink with little silver fairies embossed on them. The backyard was swathed in white and pink tulle studded with twinkling fairy lights. The food was all pink, including fairy bread with pink sprinkles, strawberry icecream cones, pink frosted cupcakes with Turkish delight studded on top. All of the guests were asked to dress in pink fairy costumes and consequently Emily’s backyard looked like the fairy grotto of her dreams. Becca was thrilled.

That was five years ago and Becca still speaks of that party, and the ones we have thrown for her each year since. Each time, we have worked with Becca on what her dreams are, and we make them come to life. To me, that’s what being a great parent is about. Not spending the most amount of money, not keeping up with the Ritchie’s, but indulging your children’s fantasies as often as possible.

I believe everyone can put together an incredible event, it’s just a matter of finding the right inspiration, having the right tools at hand and accessing support if you need it.

Happy Celebrating!

Kathryn